Mad Mikie's Laidback Lounge: Mike's Loose Lugnuts

By Mike Sanders

Drunk, Lazy, And Stupid Is No Way To Go Through Life, Son...


Especially if you're the chairman and CEO of a major sports organization. But Brain Dead manages to pull it off. On May 19th, just before the Sprint All-Star Race, he stated that he's pleased with the 2012 season: "It's been a good, solid year". Really? For whom? Maybe for you, because you're making a boat-load of cash, and The Felon is keeping your liquor cabinet fully-stocked with his weekly "donations", but what about the fans? It doesn't appears to have been such a great year for most of them, if you go by TV ratings and race attendence. Almost every track now has several sections covered by flags, tarps, or sponsor banners to attempt to hide all of the empty seats. Blimp shots of the stands get cut off abruptly once the large sections of uncovered empty seats come into view. There are no official race attendence numbers; everything is fudged. That's why you'll see numbers like "100,000" or "80,000" for race attendence. Most are completely bogus and insult the intelligence of most of the fans at the race or those watching (in decreasing numbers) at home on TV. Speaking of the All-Star Race...

The All-Star Debacle

This season, the Sprint All-Star Race was advertised as the only major sport All-Star contest in which the participants are actually trying. Considering what the NFL Pro Bowl has degraded to lately, that wouldn't be a difficult statement to make. And it has that potential: no points are on the line, and the winner gets a cool million bucks. There won't be any "points racing", so everybody can just go for it. Well, that's not quite what happened this year. The winners of the first three segments played possum at the back of the field after they won their segment, and then raced hard during the final 10 lap segment that decided the race. It was a monumental pile of horse dung. I don't want to hear about how those three drivers were "employing strategy by not using their cars up". Bull crap! After Bent Sh!tcan won the first segment then started the second segment a full straightaway behind the field, driving about as fast as my 82 year old mother, the whole thing went to hell. Someone from NASCAR should have been on the phone to the 48 team and told them that if the 48 didn't move up to the pack and race like he had a pair, he would be parked for the remainder of the race. "Sorry...no balls, no million bucks. If we wanted to see someone drive like that, we'd have put your wife behind the wheel." My solution for this mess is a simple one: make it a 100 lap race with no segments. Period. No mandatory pit stops. Stop when you need to or under caution. Determining the participants would also be simple: anybody who won a race between last year's ASR and this year's ASR gets in, as do past ASR winners. That's it. No bogus fan vote, no heat races. I can dream, can't I?

An Update On The Best Female Driver In NASCAR
And of course, it's not The Bimbo. It's Johanna Long. I wrote about her after Daytona, and, after being prodded by a couple of readers after my last article, I'll do it again now, and I'll continue to do it later in the year. The recently-turned 20 year old from Pensacola, driving for the under-funded ML Motorsports in the number 70 car, has now run 8 races this year, with an average starting position of 21.0 and an average finish of 23.8 (skewed by a 37th place finish at Talladega in which she ran only 18 laps due to overheating). The Talladega race is her only DNF of the year. She's doing great considering the lack of funding she has to deal with. By contrast, The Bimbo, in just about the best equipment money can buy, has stats of 15.4-21.0 and 3 DNF's. The Bimbo also leads Johanna in excuses for non-performance by about 23 quadrillion to zero. And speaking of The Bimbo...

Payback Is A ... Well, You Know
Good for Sam Hornish, Jr. for not putting up with The Bimbo's crap. The Bimbo puts him into the wall on the cooldown lap at Talladega, Sam retaliates with a well-timed (and COMPLETELY UNINTENTIONAL *cough, cough*) tap at Dover that basically ends her day. Good going, Sam! Unfortunately, there was a bit of collateral damage, as Brad Sweet got caught up in it. Wrong place, wrong time, etc.

NASCAR Sends Another Message

NASCAR probation has been universally scoffed at and mocked. It is (or was) completely toothless; it was their way of saying "stop...or I'll say 'stop' again". It meant nothing. Well, their suspension of Maxi Douche after his incident with writer Bob Pockrass after the Dover Nationwide race was a message to all drivers: when you're on probation, don't piss us off, or we WILL do something about it. Message received (I think). BTW, if the NASCAR media were polled off the record, I'm sure most of them would rather interview Maxi or even Mini Douche (as long as they had taken their meds) than interview Bent Sh!tcan, whose grating monotone drives everybody up the wall.

A Job Lost, A Job Saved?

I think this might have been Maxi Douche's last chance. It's a good thing that the contract between him and car owner James Finch was a handshake deal and not in writing. Finch was already having a hard time finding sponsors for the 51, but now (with the possible exception of Jerry Springer's offer, which I think is just a publicity stunt...but what a fitting driver to sponsor) I doubt any top-tier or even mid-tier sponsor would touch the 51 with a 10 foot pole as long as Maxi is behind the wheel. On the other side of things, did the win at Pocono save Burnt Toast's job in the 20 car? As much as I'd like to say that it's The Coach's call on that one, sadly the call will probably be made by Home Depot. Yep, sponsors run NASCAR these days, especially big name sponsors like HD. If they want somebody else behind the wheel of the 20 next year (this is the final year of BT's contract), then The Coach will be forced to make a change. Gotta keep the big money guys happy.

Could It Happen?
We all know that the dreaded disease know as "The Chase for the Sprint Cup" was the kneejerk reaction to Matt Kenseth winning the 2003 championship going away despite only winning one race all year. Thus far in 2012, the most consistent driver in the Cup series is also one of the drivers who hasn't won this year: that's right, it's June Bug. Wouldn't it be a nice thumb in the eye of Brain Dead and the other chuckleheads-in-charge if June Bug won the championship this year and didn't win a race? You'd be able to hear the cementheads exploding all the way here in Orlando.

TNT Takes Charge
TNT telecasted the Pocono race and has the next five races before ESPN takes over. For the first time all year I could actually see more than two cars on the track at the same time. What a concept! And while the guys in the booth aren't as bad as FOX's crew, they've got some improving to do. Still, nothing beats a "boogity"-less green flag to start a race.

No Truth To The Rumor That...

No truth to the rumor that….

Mike Helton and Jacque Debris are the same person
　
Faux King Brian declares Johnny Walker as a dependent on his income taxes
　
Santa delivered a tanker truck full of Scotch to a certain condo in Daytona Beach
　
KyBu and KuBu will be having a whine-fest at KyBu’s place on New Year’s Eve 2012
　
Santa was subpoenaed regarding a paternity test to prove he wasn’t the father of Faux King Brian’s off-spring
　
Larry Mac’s head will be sponsored by Turtle Wax for the 2012 race season
　
Motormouth Mikey received a pink tutu to wear on South Beach after the 2012 Homestead race.
　
NA$CAR will follow the WWE by having their own network.
　
The Motormouth Brothers signed a contract with ESPN-8, The Ocho, to cover tiddly winks with manhole cover tournaments instead of covering NA$CAR in 2012.
　
Zippy will be the crew chief to NA$CAR’s celebrity spokesmodel Danican’t 6 times in the same season after being fired by her 6 times.
　
John Darby bought stock in the Hair Club for Men
　
KyBu was blocked in his room Christmas morning because Santa overfilled his stocking with coal
　
JPM finally got the computer print out of his speeding penalty from John Darby for Christmas
　
Ron Hornaday dressed up in a Santa suit and filled all of KyBu’s vehicles with bull manure
　
Santa will padlock the Motormouth Brothers mouths shut during the 2012 race season
　
MWR got caught trying to boost their horsepower using gerbils on a treadmill
　
Badyear actually produced a NA$CAR racing tire that will actually last an entire race
　
Faux King Brian was caught supplementing his “sodas” with ethanol from the pump
　
All 43 cars that start the race will actually be shown by Focks & BSPN during all their broadcast
　
BSPN will hold its own against NBC Sports
　
Matt McLaughlin & I are the same person
　
Midget cars raced a 500 lapper inside the waistband of a pair of Mike Helton’s old 1990 pants
　
KuBu said to KyBu, “Mom always liked you best”
　
Cheech & Chong will enter a hemp powered car driven by Ashley Roachclip in the Daytona 500
　
NA$CAR’s celebrity spokesmodel Danican’t will be doing endorsement ads for the step ladder company that provides the step ladders used for her to get into her car
　
The person who stole the Aegis Labs laptop refused to steal Jimmie Johnson’s identity because he’s so boring
　
Faux King Brian was found spiking his “soda” with actual soda
　
Chad Knaus’ New Years Resolution was not to cheat, I mean exploit the gray area in 2012
　
JC France was caught trying to snort the white lines around DIS
　
Bruton Smith had a special buffer installed in his office to keep his head shiny
　
Mike Helton keeps Faux King Brian’s brain in a mason jar full of moonshine
　
NA$CAR’s celebrity spokesmodel Danican’t is teaching sailors how to swear
　
Somebody might find this humorous
　
I’m actually am sane and know what I’m doing
　
Faux King Brian knows what’s best for the sport
　

　

Will Phoenix Allow Kurt Busch to Rise From the Ashes?‏

By John "Dawg" Chapman



OK, by now if you were interested, you've probably read several
different takes on what the immediate future might hold for Kurt.

Being as this is kind of a 'slow news' time. I figured I might as well weigh
in, stick my neck (not too far) out, & give you my thoughts on this.

I've read numerous speculations about next season. Everything from his
winning, to even making the Chase.

Can he win? Sure he can, anyone can. Trevor Bayne, & Bad Brad have
proven that. Brad in James Finch's car, no less. Kind of ironic that this
was the first step, leading to his hiring by Penske. that lead to his
breakout season, that in all probability, lead to Kurt's "mutual" parting
with Team Penske & his ending up with Finch.

Kind of reminds me of the cat, that killed the rat, that ate the malt,
that lay in the house, that Jack built. As he'd previously also been
fired from the house that Jack built. It does sort of tie together, doesn't
it? But I digress.

My unequivocal, 100% iron clad answer to both of these scenarios is
definitely.... maybe, on the winning. But I doubt it. As for the second
part, no way Jose. Just look at the cars that couldn't even give that a
good shot in '11, with a lot more going for them.

Seriously, here's what I do see happening, & needing to happen. If this is
going to be the season that he repairs his image, & starts his move back
up the ladder.

To this point in his career, he's been in Championship, or at least
consistent, winning cars. He's been used to teams that had full time
pit crews. Crews who's only job is to hone their over the wall skills,
& pit the car.

With Crew Chef's that had worked their way up through the ranks
to become CCs on top cars. Engineers, shock specialists, etc,etc, etc.
With his current team he doesn't have that luxury.

Much has been made of the fact that the team gets it's equipment from
Hendrick, just like Stewart-Haas. While the first part is true, I seriously
doubt the just like Tony, part. As Hillary's book pointed out. In Africa,
It takes a village, to raise a child. Well in Cup, It takes a team, to field
a car. I do have to wonder about the current strength of the team that
surrounds Kurt.

I'll have to admit that I don't know very much about Nick Harrison, his
current CC. His Cup record is not very impressive,( nor are his meager
Nationwide stats.) Actually, it's about what you'd expect for a car that
up to this time has been basically a field filler operation. Nick wasn't
CC, when Brad won with this team. He's has had 47 starts, over 2
years.
　
With 0 top 5, 0 T-10, finishes, 0 poles, & only 11 lead lap finishes.
With an average finishing position of 29th, last year. While finishing
30th in owners points. This could very well not be as much a reflection
on his abilities, as much as the circumstances he's found himself in.
They had 26 finishes of 25th or worse. This is for sure going to
improve. Just how much improvement we see depends on more than
just Kurt.

James has already made a big change, by putting Kurt in the car. I think
now, & I do mean NOW, he needs to look at every one in the organization,
top, to bottom. With the shrinkage going on in the Cup, & Nationwide
garages, some very good people are available. With fewer people, each, &
every one needs to be the best he can get. He very well might already have
them, that's for him to decide.

Kurt has repeatedly stated that he wants' to have fun racing. While I've
obviously never been exposed to racing at this level, I doubt that it's
meant to be fun. While I'm sure it can be fun at times. It's also pressure
packed, & the way he's dealt with that pressure, is in large part what got
him where he is. Anyone who thinks that he won't be under much pressure
with this team, isn't looking at the big picture. He really can't afford any
cracks in his composure next season, & it's a very long season.

Marty Robbins, used to do it for fun, but that was another time,
& he had a pretty good day job to fall back on.
If he really wants to have fun, then perhaps he needs to buy a dirt late
model, & go be the big duck, in some little puddle.

Let's hope his work with a sports psychologist, wasn't just damage control.
But, a serious attempt to get at the root causes that brought on his
problems. Because he's going to have a lot of new frustrations to
deal with. How he's able to deal with them, will be the difference between
this being his first step back to where he wants to be, or his current
situation becoming the new reality. So far in both their NASCAR
careers, the Busch Brats, have made 'Busch self control'. into
one of my favorite oxymoron's. Right behind NASCAR credibility.

He's going to need to deal successfully with his issues in public, & treat
the media with respect. Keep his radio conversations, professional.
Then if he wants' to go back to the motor home, & take 'em out on the
crockery, so be it. Pull this off, & I believe he can climb the ladder again,
but it will take some time.

One thing that can be a blessing, or a curse, will be the scrutiny that
Kurt will be under. Handle it correctly, & I believe that the team will
start to pick up some sponsorship. Probably not national companies,
maybe, but small, & mid-sized companies that need the TV exposure
that Kurt, in the 51 car is sure to garner for them. More money, well
spent, should equate to better performance. Once this starts, it should
feed itself.

As far as winning races, this team has proven that it could do it, against
long odds.

If I were in James's shoes, here's what I'd try. I'd enter a second car for
the plate tracks. David Ragan is a very solid plate driver. I'd hire him for
all 4 plate races. That way Kurt would have a good, experienced, team
mate to work with. As Daytona's the best paying race of the season, if the
second car made the field. That would go a long way to funding it for the
rest of the plate races. A good finish for it would just be icing on the
cake. This should give the best shot at a win. Maybe a long shot,
but not as long as winning the first one was.

I expect that if Kurt, & James were to stay together for say, 3 years.
Then we might see them in the Chase, or at least giving it a good run.
But it's just too big a leap for 1 season.

I'm looking more for steady progress, of the baby steps variety next year.
A move from 30, to 20, in points, with 4-5, T-10 finishes, & maybe a T-5
or 2 would be a very good season, & it's doable.

I wouldn't be surprised if this deal has an escape clause, so that if Kurt
were to get a better offer, he could take it. Who knows, with the pressures
on teams now, that could come before the season's out. Personally, I'd
love to see them stay together. They could be good for each other, but
that's asking a lot.

This whole deal is going to be a real test, for both Kurt, & The team, but
it can be done. One thing I can absolutely guarantee.

It's not all going be fun.

What Does NASCAR Get For $15,231,323.00?‏

By John "Dawg" Chapman

What does NASCAR get for 15 million, 231 thousand, 323 dollars?
Not much as it turns out. That's how much prize money the Start & Park
teams took home in 2011 for showing up so that the starting formation
would look the same on TV for the parade lap.

I've heard it said that a part of the TV deal, was that NASCAR would
start 43 cars. I doubt this is accurate, but for some reason NASCAR
seems willing to reward the teams that show up, with no intention
of adding anything to the show.

My question is, do you think NASCAR's getting their money's worth?
Remember we're talking $15 million, 231 thousand, & change. What's
the difference if 43 cars start, & we're down to 37, or so, after 30
laps. Or if only that number started the race?

I've heard all the excuses for allowing this to go on.

First thing people throw out is that these teams are going the S & P
route to keep their teams together, until they can come up with the
money to race. Fair enough, I can understand that, but at what point do
they have to say it's not working? Over the last three seasons, Phoenix
Racing, Phil Parsons, have started 88 races, not counting the ones they
were unable to qualify for, & been running at the end in 5 of them.

Over this same stretch Joe Nemechek (a driver who's skill I admire)
has started 102 races, been running at the end in 7, 5 of them in '09.
Joe was the most successful S & P owner this season. Qualifying for all
36 races, plus running Kevin Conway in 3 more. Joe was able to finish
just one race out of the 36. In these 3 races, Kevin ran a total of 4,
count 'em 4 laps, while winning $234,238. or an average of $58,559.5 per lap.
It would have been $78,079 if he hadn't gotten a little crazy, & run that second lap.
Good work if you can get it.

Another excuse I've heard is that these teams provide employment
in a tough economic environment. OK, things are tough all over. Suppose
that people were hired to build roads that no one was ever going to drive on.
That would provide employment also, but would you consider it money well spent?

I do have to kind of admire Joe Ruttman for showing up at The Rock
in '04 without a pit crew in James Finch's car. I mean at least he was
honest about it. Why would he need a crew? He was allowed to start.
Ka Ching, then was parked by NASCAR on the first lap. Mission
accomplished.

As I said I can understand the strategy, of hanging in, while trying
to put things in place to be able to compete. I just have to wonder,
at what point does it become a business plan?

Both Front Row Racing, & Tommy Baldwin have used the S & P
at times due to economic necessity, but are now racing full time.
More power to them, the only problem is that due to funding, &
the mega-teams. Both programs are mired mostly in the 30's.
Dave Blaney was in line for a good finish at Daytona, until
he was wrecked by Kurt Busch. He steered clear of Kurt at
Talladega, & was able to pull off a third. Got interviewed on
TV afterward. Had to have been a real boost for the team,
as well as Golden Corral, whose Kids Eat Free, promotion
kicked in.

Front Row has both of their cars, the 34, & 38 locked in for the
first 5 races on the new season.

Tommy Baldwin also has the 36 locked in, & is trying to get
the 35 up to speed. I do find Geoffrey Bodine a curious choice
but sounds like he's bringing a little money, & for these teams
money not only talks, it screams.

Kevin Buckler's TRG Racing has come up short, finishing
the season 36th in owners points. Any time teams that really
show up to race, fall out of the top 35, as the 71 did. They
are then subject to being out qualified by the S & P cars.
Thus making it likely that they stay mired below the magic
35th place. Making it that much harder to come up with even
a one race sponsor, much less landing a full season deal.

I'm not meaning to imply that the cars that come to race are in any
better than the S & P teams, quality wise. In fact Joe Nemechek, if he
were to get a little backing, could easily be a solid mid 20's place car.
He regularly qualified well, up among cars with much better backing.
He didn't get the nick name Front Row Joe, for nothing.

For the 71 team next season, finishing 46th shouldn't really be a problem
because of 4 qualified teams going away. At least 2, the 33, & 6, probably
will keep their points & run Daytona. The 33, probably with Austin Dillon,
& the 6, maybe with Ricky Stenhouse. That would leave the slots from the
2 Red Bull cars. So the 71 & 7 should move up based on their finishes.
But this being NA$CAR, & NA$CAR being all about $$$. These spots will
go to the highest bidder, rather than to the next in line. Kevin & Robby
could well end up with them, but they're going to have to pay.

With the shrinkage next year, there will be more opportunities for S & P
teams. Cars are available at bargain rates. Plenty of drivers, with Cup experience,
& skills to get them in the field, & who can blame them?

That begs the question, how many S & P teams are too many?
Next year, instead of 6, we could see 9 or 10.

Here's what I'd really like to see happen. NASCAR could cut the field to 40,
& the 3 less cars would never be missed. Then make the same payout that they
had when the field was at 43. The last thing I'm trying to do is to allow
NASCAR, or Bruton to put more money in their pockets.

In a season when we've lost 4 quality cars, do we really need 4 more field
fillers running around, even if they could get them all to race?
As the field gets weaker, the top 35 rule makes less, & less sense.
The timing is perfect to dump this turkey.

If another of the cuts were to be the past champions provisional,
well I could live with that too.

For an average race this should give them around $200K to work with.
Graduate the money to raise the purse on the bottom third, to help the
teams that need help the most.

Even better would be a pay structure with a straight graduation from
1st, to last, but I'm we'll probably never see that.

For example, at Talladega, Michael Waltrip finished 9th. His payout was
$83,500. Carl finished 11th, his was $128.866. Some of this pay structure
is a holdover from the days when NASCAR promoted 60-70 races a year, & was to induce the top cars to show up. How long ago did that ship sail?

To make sure the money goes where it does the most good, ANY car that falls
out before half way, without a verifiable reason would have their payout cut
by half. In other words, it would no longer be cost effective to S & P.

I want to see the payouts raised, I just hate to see someone like Kevin
Conway who in 3 races, ran 4 laps total, & in each, collected within
500. of what someone got for running the entire race. That's just wrong.
In a perfect world, I'd love to see all cars start that be capable of
winning.

Racing is not a perfect world. Never was, never will be. I'd just like see
NASCAR help the teams that are really trying & stop subsidizing the ones
that just show up to take the money & run. Run for home that is.

Random Ramblings

By John "Dawg" Chapman

Overall I think this season ranks as one of the more interesting in recent
years.

Week to week, the actual racing wasn't always spectacular, but the variety
of winners was quite refreshing.

Starting with Daytona, just like last year, we were treated to another
"feel good" surprise winner. While most everyone else was focusing on
Trevor Bayne. I must confess, I was focusing on the Wood Brothers.
This is a team that I greatly admire, for a variety of reasons.

Their history, the fact that they haven't resorted to starting, &
parking, & they haven't given up. What's not to like? The same goes for
Trevor Bayne. I've said that the racing wasn't always exciting, & that goes
in spades for the plate tracks, Daytona included.

If not for a rule infraction, David Ragan probably would have been the
winner. It was like Trevor just ran out of anyone to push, & sort of had
the win thrust upon him. David's ill advised move, is right up there with

Marcos Ambrose's fuel conservation move at Infineon. If David hadn't

changed lanes early & had won. He & UPS would have both basked in

the glow of a big win. He'd probably still have UPS, his ride, & a lot of

hardworking people at Roush, would still have their jobs. Funny how

things work out.

From The Department Of Meaningless Statistics
(I think modeled after Monty Pythons Department of Silly Walks.)

After every plate race, the talking heads are quick to point out how many
lead changes there were. This is usually followed up with articles from

outlets with a vested interest. Such as nascar.com, & NASCAR's TV partners.
All this really tells us is with this tango style racing, anyone can be pushed

to the lead. That is, if they're not scared to be up front. Come on guys, give us

a little credit here. We're not as gullible as you think we are. If you're going to tout something, make sure it has some relevance.

Thinking of rather meaningless things, brings my next topic to mind.

Andy Lally wins Rookie of the Year!

Last years winner was Kevin Conway. No slight on Andy intended.

He's a strong driver with a great resume in sports cars. Kevin managed

to log laps, & bring his cars home in one piece, though usually 4-5 laps down.
I do have one question. Who'd they beat out to win?

Thirty seven year old Dale Junior has a girlfriend & it's considered news.
I don't know about you, but I find this just a tad on the strange side.

Way to go, Furniture Row.

I really don't care what NASCAR says, or how much they hype it.
The Daytona 500 will never be the biggest race, as far as I'm concerned.
it will always be the Southern 500. This is the granddaddy of them all.
At the track too tough to die. Despite NASCAR's best efforts to kill it.
They took it's date. They took it's race, (at least they got the name back.)
This track is about as far from Cookie Cutter, as you can get.
This was my feel good story of the year. Well done guys.

We had a number of races decided on fuel mileage. Put me down as one
of the fans who think these fuel mileage races SUCK! NASCAR, (& they're

not the only ones) have been known to resort to a caution when they feel

that a race needs help. I'd dearly love to see them be honest,& up front about it.

Why not just throw a competition caution with 25 laps to go if it looks like fuel is going to be an issue.

 

Make it a timed stop. Give them 25 seconds, for final adjustments, fuel,
& tires. Then line them back up in the order they were running. Anyone

exceeding the time limit would go tailback. This would take out the fuel

& tire strategy. Then the race could be decided the way all races ought to

be decided. They could just race, & may the best car, & driver win. Sure

it's contrived, but with phantom debris cautions, the Chase, & the Top 35 Rule.

We're pretty much conditioned to contrived by now.

For the second year, we had a driver, out with a mysterious medical
condition. Last year Brian Vickers, this year Trevor Bayne.
Thankfully, both were resolved satisfactorily.

　

Speaking of Brian Vickers, Usually when a driver knows in advance that
he's losing his ride. The remaining time becomes an audition.
Brian appeared to have been auditioning for a ride in a demolition derby.


I expect that the Busch Brats, have been at this sibling rivalry for a very
long time. This season they seemed to be in a "can you top this"
competition. Back in the day, when the "Battling Bodines” were going at it.

They kept it in the family. If the Busch Brats were on that program, I think

the TV ratings would go up enough that sponsors would be coming out of the

woodwork, everyone would still have rides, & jobs. Instead they took their

frustrations out on everyone around them. How'd that work out guys?

Personally, I think Sprout won, but Baby Face is out of his ride. By mutual

agreement, he hastens to add, go figure.

One thing that struck me is that Dr. Jerry is a much more tolerant person
than I am. Was it just me, or did anyone else sense just the slightest note
of insincerity in Richard's apology? As a watch collector, I did admire his
attention to detail.

Note to NASCAR collectors, items from teams the Busch Brats have
been fired from could make an interesting collection. For as talented as

they are, they sure get around. Baby Face's Shell 22 stuff is probably on

super close out. Your chance for a good buy, from the good bye.

I seem to remember a song lyric, about "One being the loneliest number." If
Earnhardt- Ganassi Racing with Felix Sabates (what a mouthful, somebody's
not pulling their weight in that outfit) doesn't get their act together. They & Jamie

might find out how lonely it really is. They've made some changes, I just hope

they're enough. Next year could be very important for them.

I really admire the teams on limited budgets that show each week, to
actually race. Usually for not much more prize money than the S & P
teams take home for their 20 laps or so. I'd love to see these teams form
some kind of alliance along the lines of the old RAD, (Richard Childress,
Andy Petree, & Dale Earnhardt.) To share information, test results, etc.
This would allow all of them to do more with less. The big drawback to
anything like this actually happening, is the top 35 rule. As long as this is in

place they'd have a tough time working together. With such an alliance in

place, it should give them a better shot to out qualifying the S & P teams.

Junior wins most popular driver award. The Sun came up in the east,
this morning. Neither was much of a surprise.

Well, the Crew Chief Silly Season chips have mostly all fallen.
Still hearing rumbles about Zippy. Seems a little late for this to happen,
but as we saw with Darien Grubb, anything's possible. Be interesting to see how things shake out for all the new combinations.

As of this writing, the hot rumor is that Baby Face maybe picked up by
RPM. Haven't read too much about this from the King himself.
After what he's been through with his last partner, I'd hate to see
anyone thrust on him that he doesn't want. Richard's so straight laced
that he didn't even run the Busch Beer contingency sticker on his car,
& was thus ineligible for the Busch Clash for pole winners.
He & the elder brat would seem an odd mix. One other thing to be
considered is Ford. He dropped the brand like a bad habit when he
was the their defending Champion. Sometimes something that didn't
seem all that important at the time could come back to haunt him.

Well, I've done it. Missed another Snowball Derby. After I promised myself
this was the year. Guess I'll have to fall back on the Cub fans annual
refrain, "wait 'till next year". Bummer.

 



The Hot Seat

By Dawg Chapman



Unless you're like the guy in the insurance commercial, & live under a rock.
Just why this guy would need insurance always puzzled me, but you get
the idea.

Then you know that as of this writing, a winning Cup seat just become
available, on very short notice. This came about because of a mutual
agreement between Penske, Shell, & Kurt Busch. This strikes me as pretty
significant, because it's probably the only time Bush has been agreeable the
entire season. In a few short months, I'm going to agree to pay my taxes.
It's pretty much the same deal, I expect.

This has to be considers a real serendipitous stroke of luck. Just when some
name drivers had pretty much given up hope of landing a quality ride for 2012,
& were sifting through the available rides. Looking, I'm sure for something
that offered a glimmer of turning into something more than another year of
just hanging on in Cup.

The names most often mentioned are David Reagan, Brian Vickers, David
Reutimann, & Sam Hornish Jr. It's a shame that Clint Bowyer had settled for a seat owned by in his words, "the worst driver in NASCAR." Hmmm, I wonder if there's anything like the "10 second rule" applying to NASCAR contracts? Maybe it could be annulled like a marriage that was never consummated. I really like Clint, but I'll
be unable to pull for him as long as he's driving for Super Shill, but I digress.

One thing that I noticed, was that Elliott Sadler's name was never
mentioned.

I do have a few fantasy picks, & I'm sure you probably do too.

I'd love to see Bobby Labonte, in a good car again. This isn't a put down
of the 47, but as a single car team, they have lots of room for improvement.
Getting out from under Super Shill's umbrella is a good first step, but there's
a lot more steps to be taken before they get to where they want to be. I doubt
Bobby's got time to make the trip. Terry got a similar chance with Hendrick,
late in his career & picked up a second Championship, as a result. Who knows,
maybe lightning could strike twice?

Another good choice, & my personal favorite, would be Robby Gordon.
After 6 Busch years, (sort of like dog years) having Robby on board,
would seem a lot less difficult. Robby's been plowing pretty rocky ground
the last couple of years, & might have a different outlook on being a
little more of an organization man now.

One spot that's empty in Robby's crowded trophy case is for the Indy 500.
If an Indy seat were part of the deal. This could be the perfect win, win
situation for all involved. Another plus that Robby could bring, would be
a ton of very loyal, hard core fans. Way more than any of the other drivers
being considered.

It's no secret, that I think Dave Blaney has been on the short end of
the stick, his NASCAR entire career. I'd dearly love to see what he
could do in a top ride. Again, no disrespect to the 36. I'm happy that
Dave's got a full time ride, that is actually able to race, but...well, you
know.

At this time, it looks like David Ragan his the inside track on the ride,
& of the drivers most mentioned, he's probably the best choice.
One thing is certain, he'll never embarrass the organization, or the
sponsor the way Kurt did.

Whoever ends up in the seat next season, is going to find it a
"hot seat." They're not going to measure up to the criteria that
Shell wants in a driver, so it's sounding like they will be on a one
year contract.

When you consider the alternatives, any driver that's offered the ride,
will jump at the deal. But they need to consider it a year long try out,
& a year like they had this year won't cut it.

Another driver who's in a pretty hot seat, would be Kyle.
I really think both of the Busch Brats should be looking for work
now, but neither his sponsor, or owner was willing to take that
step.....Yet.

I've said several times that "I don't see Kyle as a candy salesman."
One more embarrassing temper tantrum, & Mars/M & M may well
come to the same conclusion.

You can conact Dawg HERE

Yes Virginia, There Is A Consequence

By John "Dawg" Chapman

Well, the already long NASCAR unemployment queue just got longer by one
person.

While my heart goes out to the hundreds of crew, or more correctly, former crew members, & their families who are looking at not only a bleak holiday season. But most probably a pretty bleak future in their chosen field as well. We've all heard the phrase, "you'll never work in this town again", for many this could be true.

These are people who have worked incredibly long, & hard to put the very best car, or truck, on the track each & every week, & have done it for pride, rather than just for a paycheck. While some of these skills are transferrable to other jobs. It will never be the same. These folks are unemployed, through no fault of their own.

The same can't be said of the latest person to join that sad line. Kurt pretty much volunteered, to join. I'm going to have a really hard time working too much sympathy for him. He does have something few others in line possess. He's got talent, but that's not it. Everyone in line has talent, or they wouldn't have been there in the first place. What he has is a very fat wallet to soften the blow.He's not going to have to worry about the house, & car, payments. The kids orthodontist, or all those other things that most of his neighbors in line have to deal with.

This whole deal reminds me of the Billy Joel song, Somewhere Along the Line.

"I knew that there'd be hell to pay,
when the fun falls through,
& the rent comes due.
Somewhere along the line"

 

The difference between Kurt, & the guy in the song, was that the song Dude, (& no, I'm not talking about Mr. Penske) knew that the day of reckoning was coming. I seriously doubt that Kurt had figured that out. When you've always gotten a pass, why would you expect anything else? He will have his own unique worries to deal with.

Do I think that Kurt will never have another steady Cup ride? No I don't think that at all. Of all the words that have been written about the brothers Busch. No one has ever questioned their talent. Do I think that he's just left his last really competitive ride? Obviously, the jury's still out on that, & it's way too soon to tell, but I do know this.When "A" company signs on as sponsor, the driver becomes the face of the company.Without a solid sponsor, all that is available to any driver is the "shirt tail" rides. I'd say at this point, it's pretty much a coin flip.

The net, is like print books. Once it's out there, it's pretty much always  out there. If anyone cares to look, it can be found.You can bet that when Kurt, or an owner approaches any corporation for sponsorship. That corporation is going to look at everything they can find on him, as they would, & should for any driver.What they'll find on the social networks, is not some bleeped out network footage. Sanitized for the kiddies, but exactly what he said, & what he said,was way beyond what most corporations want to be associated with. I expect these things are far from done, biting him in the butt.

As of now, Kyle has a distinct advantage, with his deal because his current sponsor, Mars/M&M is not a public company, so the family can make a decision & not have to worry about blowback from stockholders. Kurt's not so lucky.

Either way, I think we can safely say, for Kurt. "The fun's fallen through and the rent's come due."

We tend to focus on the drivers, & Crew Chiefs, because we have names & faces, but don't forget about all the other NASCAR folks in line ahead of Kurt.

The off season might indeed be short, but for these families, there's no new season coming up. With highly specialized job skills, in a very weak job market, it could be a long cold winter.

 

You can contact Dawg HERE

Homestead Press Conference Transcript

For those of you who missed Faux King Brian’s Homestead press conference, here are the official transcripts regarding the press conference. You’ll notice that instead of getting to pat himself on the back for the poor job he’s done this season, he spends a good chunk of his time being questioned about the Double Secret Probation Fines that have been issued and does a poor job of defending the the Double Secret Probation Fines. One little fib. he states there has been nothing in place to punish people saying bad things about NA$CAR. There has been something in place since the days of his grandfather Bill France Sr. It's called "blackballing" somebody. More recently, when KuBu made some comments about the officials when he was driving the #97 car, his hard card was pulled which meant KuBu had to sign in every time he went to a track. A member of the television media questioned some decisions of NA$CAR and was KuBu's sign-in buddy as his hard card was also pulled.

So put on your hipwaders and have your air sickness bags at the ready.

　

BRIAN FRANCE: Good afternoon, everyone. I would say a couple of things that I've said before in previous get-togethers with the media. That obviously we think the season has gone very well. TV ratings, attendance, still some issues, depending on what market you're talking about.

Obviously, the economy continues to weigh heavily on the sponsorship component of our sport. We rely more on sponsorships than anybody in sports, so that obviously has an effect on us.

But the quality of racing throughout the year, the emphasis on winning that we keep adjusting to, I think is undeniably it is paying dividends. I would also say one thing about that. There was some wisdom or conventional wisdom some time ago that if you put more on the line, you put more emphasis on winning in Motorsports, that that wouldn't make a big difference because they're all out racing as hard as they can every lap, and it wouldn't make that big of a difference. And that's not true. We now know that's just not true.

When there is more on the line, you're seeing every weekend Tony Stewart and Carl, and everybody elevate and their entire teams are elevating their performance and the competition gets better when that happens. You saw that last year with Denny and Jimmie.

So naturally we're going to continue to look at the point system in a way that -- and the other portions of how we regulate and conduct the events, with an emphasis on just that.

But one more thing as this weekend unfolds, and naturally we're all excited because we're fans too, to watch and see what happens on Sunday. But the other thing that is happening in the marketplace is some really, really good things.

We held a Green Summit for the first time in Miami Beach yesterday. Had a number of companies that are doing some really, really great things in our industry - they're environmentally smart and productive - share their experiences. And we had a lot of new companies that were interested in what NASCAR was up to in the space where their technologies and their emphasis is. So they joined us as well.

My hope is that we'll continue to march down that road and get better and smarter and we'll attract more companies as a result of that.

Then just this morning, we awarded a $250,000 check to the Homestead Hospital in the Neonatal Care Center, trying to invest in the hospital as part of our NASCAR Foundation, and my mother and so on was there to present that.

In addition to an exciting weekend, the industry is really celebrating the fact that they're here in South Florida and doing some great things. So, with that, I'll be happy to take some questions.

Q. Brian, in particular light to your comments about the winning. Eight years ago Matt Kenseth won the championship before the Chase, had one win for the season which seemed to cause an uproar, and thus the Chase format was developed. Carl has an opportunity on Sunday to again win a championship with only one race week win in the entire season. Why should that be looked on any different as what Matt Kenseth did in 203?

BRIAN FRANCE: Because we didn't change the point system because somebody had one win or a few wins. That was never the emphasis. The emphasis was that we could create bigger moments if we had a more playoff style atmosphere as opposed to a complete consistency model in the years past. And we've achieved that goal, not all the time because it's obviously out of our control.

I would tell you the one win that Carl had might make the difference though. He only leads by three points. The one win in Las Vegas may well make the difference tomorrow. I don't know.

Clearly we cannot make winning the only thing. There are 43 teams racing at every weekend. So this is not -- however, we can make sure that we emphasize that. We can make sure that we reward that. And we're pretty happy that that translates into better racing.

Q:Not taking anything away from Jimmie's great accomplishments of five straight there. How much do you think an uptick of interest that there's been to have a new face fighting out for the championship this year?

BRIAN FRANCE: I don't know. But I do know that this will mark the end of one of the historic runs in all of sports with five consecutive championships. I would have never thought I would witness that.

Jimmie it's just a marvelous achievement, and Carl and Tony both are very popular, so they're creating new moments and we'll have to see how it all plays out.

Q. There's been an uptick in the television ratings. I'm wondering is that what you expected? Is that a slow surge to what you think will be more? Is it less than you thought it would be? What are you working on in the off-season that would be your main goals for next year?

BRIAN FRANCE: We've always said that ratings go up and down because of many, many things. The things we can control are showcasing the racing, telling our story, and giving the drivers some big moments to race for. That will help us. You never know how it all percentage- wise what really matters the most.

But we know that that's the NASCAR we want. We want to see these elevated performances, and they're just fun to watch. We want to see what's happened. I'm confident if we do that, and do a lot of other things, we will have better ratings and better attendance.

Q. NASCAR has fined, at least four times that we know of, drivers for disparaging remarks they've made, and NASCAR did not go public with those fines. Other leagues do. They do publicly say you can't talk about the officials. You can't talk about this or the league. Why does NASCAR take the position that these matters should be private and not public? Are there others that we don't know about?

BRIAN FRANCE: There could be. That's why they're private, right? Well, let me tell you what we've done in the last couple of years. In the last couple of years we've taken a position that drivers are going to be able to speak their mind and criticize the sport way more than any other sport would allow. So let's start with that.

However, there have to be some limits. We thought those limits were being exceeded in the last couple of years because you can't denigrate the sport. You just can't do that. We're not going to accept that.

You know what is interesting, almost every driver has come up to me at one time or another and said I'm glad you did that, because I don't like it when somebody just says something that is irresponsible about the sport.

Let me say one other portion of this. They are perfectly fine to criticize anything we do, any call we make. They can say they don't like it, they disagree with it. We didn't make the right call. That's fine. But we're not going to let anyone denigrate the sport, and that's going to continue.

Whether we make the fines public or private, we didn't see a benefit to making them public. If there is some benefit to that, we'll take a look at it. But that is the reasoning behind the penalties.

Q. But don't you think there is harm when it comes out after and fans take the stance of why did they do this in secret? What else are they doing in secret? In fact we're talking about secret fines today instead of your big game seven moment?

BRIAN FRANCE: That's up to you to what to write and be interested about. I can only tell you that I take every question. I never say no comment. I've explained it. If there's a better way -- sort of this idea that there are a bunch of things going on behind the curtain. We've never been more transparent. We've never had more of anything, and that is the way it should be.

If there's a benefit to announcing them to the public and the media, we'll take a look at them. We just didn't see a benefit at the time. Maybe there is a benefit.

Q. How much did the Kyle Busch situation at Texas concern you? How do you balance boys-have-at-it in retaliation with what appears to be a non-definitive line?

BRIAN FRANCE: That's not accurate. It was very concerning to all of us. There was a swift and very is he penalty on that as you know. There is a line and the drivers, and they may walk around and say sometimes that they're not clear about it, but they know the line.

We have these conversations with them all the time. What you've got to remember is this is a contact sport. So you're going to -- we thought a couple years ago that we were overregulating the events. We wanted to give more authority back in the drivers' hands, and that's been good for NASCAR.

But there is always a limit. You can't do anything you want. We will look at it. We talked to the drivers. If they're close to the line, we have a conversation that day. If they go over the line, we'll deal with that too.

So this idea that there is no -- nobody knows where the line is, not true. Not accurate.

Q. Brian, corporations all across the United States have been raising funds for the last years or so while you guys are looking for sponsorships. What is NASCAR doing to get corporate treasurers to open up the purse strings and become sponsors at a time when NASCAR really needs the employment?

BRIAN FRANCE: If the President of the United States is not getting them to do that, I'm not sure what we're going to be able to do to figure that out. But having said that, obviously we just held a green summit. We were doing things that attract new companies, new technology to validate in our sport. We're renewing a lot of companies, and some companies -- and it happens all the time, every year for us, will pull back their sponsorship or commitments or leave all together.

That is just the reality of having hundreds of companies involved in this sport. But we're working harder than ever with the teams and their business groups to tell the NASCAR story and the value that it brings to sponsors. We're having success with that.

I think if you ask the individual team owners, we've never had a more offensive strategy doing it together to bring in as many new companies as possible.

Q. After the test you ran this week in Daytona, what are the goals you're looking for for Daytona in February, and is one of them a virtual complete elimination of the tandem drafting? Is that one of the things you're after?

BRIAN FRANCE: It is one of the things we are after. We would prefer to eliminate tandem racing in the manner it exists today. There is no question about that. We are working on rolling back the clock to traditional Daytona, Talladega races. We'll have to see how that goes. I think the majority of fans would like to see that and so would we.

Q. You mentioned that you answer every question and you don't duck anything. There was a time when your grandfather and your father attended every race. They did these press conferences almost every Saturday or Sunday behind the hauler or whatever. We don't see you very often. We wonder why is it that you think the sport that you're not needed at every weekend or just why are you not around more often for these press deals?

BRIAN FRANCE: I frequently say, and I've said this before, if I thought that I was the last one out of every event and I turn the light off on the way out that that would grow the sport in some way, I would do it.

What we have is a different sport than it was 10, 15 years ago, and that's real clear. I don't publish my schedule, but it's pretty busy. We feel like we're managing the sport. We know we're managing the sport the best way that we need to to grow the sport.

Q. Could there come a time in the future where all the penalties are transparent? That they're all black and white so it can be reported as normal rather than just finding things out on the internet secondhand? Secondly, Bob earlier mentioned the Kyle Busch incident. Can you explain to me other than Brian Vickers' situation last week where he was not under caution as Kyle Busch was with Ron Hornaday at Texas, why Brian Vickers, something wasn't done about him when he, in fact, just came out of nowhere and plowed into Matt Kenseth for no apparent reason other than retaliation?

BRIAN FRANCE: Well, there is something being done about that. We're having a conversation about that, and they are very different circumstances. One was on a mile and a half track, a lot faster. One was under caution, which is very significant different.

Racing accidents under green are always subjective. Even though you may say this one wasn't, but typically there is always a debate about who went where. Ron Hornaday was racing for a championship, and you know we value that greatly.

So there are lots of differences. It doesn't mean though that we didn't think the line was almost met or somewhat close, whereby, we would have a conversation to explain that. We will be having a conversation with both Brian and Matt regarding really what happened in Martinsville the week before, which is a short track.

A lot of contact happened in that particular race. Like I said earlier, there is a line. The drivers know where the line is. If we should be guessing about that for some reason, we're happy to sit down and walk them through it.

Q. Ricky Stenhouse is probably going to win the Nationwide championship tomorrow. The decision NASCAR made to limit drivers to one championship run, has NASCAR gotten what they want out of that or is that policy going to be reviewed at any point?

BRIAN FRANCE: All policies are reviewed, but I think it's worked the way we want it to. We want to showcase the young drivers in their own series and still have the participation with drivers with a lot of experience. That's exactly what we've gotten.

I think it's been good for the young drivers to get some different notoriety. The honor and prestige of winning a championship and the money that comes with that and all the rest has been a good thing.

Q. Going back to the driver fines things. When you say you don't see a benefit to that, can you explain why there is no benefit to that? It would seem like if you're punishing somebody for disparaging the sport, you would want to let people know we're punishing this guy because we don't like what he said. In this room, you're monitoring social media, all the fans want to know more about it and want to understand why. It just feeds to the perception that you're an autocratic regime that doles out punishment in a capricious manner. Why would you not want to tell people here's why we're doing it?

BRIAN FRANCE: Sure. I'll explain it. We went for 50-something years and never had a system to fine anybody for disparaging remarks in the sport. We're the only sport on the planet that had that. So we simply really in the last couple of years changed that policy because we thought we needed to.

. So it's a new policy. It's not something that's been around for a long time. But like I said, we're happy to look at that in the off-season. See what benefit there would be. When it comes to social media, nobody is investing more, doing more, encouraging the drivers and everybody in the industry to participate on social media. Say what you want and all the rest.

So, you know, we ought not look at one policy and try to define how NASCAR approaches things.

Q. What's the primary benefit to not telling people? BRIAN FRANCE: The way we looked at it, what would be the benefit? The drivers know exactly what we're after. We have these annual meetings with them, right? And then we have semi-annual meetings with them, and we meet with them every weekend at the track. We have formal meetings in the off-season.

So they know exactly what we expect out of them. When they don't handle that, the only way we can control that is obviously a fining system. But look, don't panic over this. We'll look at it in the off-season, if we need to change it, we'll change it. Not a big deal.

Q. You mentioned earlier about the Chase format and that you're always adjusting. Is there a good chance that the Chase format will be tweaked yet again for the following season?

BRIAN FRANCE: It's possible. I don't know. We take those ideas throughout the year. We really look at them as carefully as we can. Then what we do is we run them past the team owners and drivers and other -- everybody else in the industry in the off-season before we would do anything, and that's exactly what we did last year going into this year.

We looked at all kinds of things and settled on this as a nice step forward to simplifying the point system. Hopefully getting what we have, which is a more competitive Chase, and we'll look at it again. I don't know where we'll end up.

Q. As far as the Chase goes, it's been a really exciting Chase. As far as when you came up with the idea of the chase and then you tweaked it. Did you expect that kind of result what do you feel about the future?

BRIAN FRANCE: I actually expected more years like this, frankly. I couldn't imagine somebody as incredibly dominating as Jimmie has been in a five-year run, so you have to give him an enormous amount of credit.

But our expectation is that given the balance of things that we have 43 cars at every event and given the nature of auto racing and how it unfolds and some of the traditions that you have to obviously respect, I think the current system and more tweaks will always come and we'll just have to see what they are.

Q. We're here for the first time actually, so we're growing interesting in NASCAR covering, and I would like you to talk about the growing of NASCAR in other countries than the USA, like Brazil with Nelson Piquet and Miguel Paludo?

BRIAN FRANCE: I think it's great. I was in Mexico City Wednesday and Thursday working on that very issue. We've got an Hispanic driver from Mexico running in the truck race this weekend. Our diversity program focusing on that.

So any time we are able to attract a talented driver, Juan Pablo being an example or anyone else, I think that broadens up the sport. Makes us more relevant to whatever home country that they're from, and we view that as a very good thing.

Q. Specifically in terms of what Brad said as far as EFI goes, what was it about that that NASCAR thought crossed the line? It wasn't a case of what Denny did in impugning the integrity of the sanctioning body, but more or less expressing opinion on the technological direction of the sport at that particular point. Could you at least elaborate on that?

BRIAN FRANCE: I can't elaborate on that because we didn't issue a public fine on that. You can read into what people say just like I can. When you cross a line that denigrates the direction of the sport or the quality of the racing, we're not going to accept that. Not going to accept it.

Happy to have any other criticism, any other complaint, happy to hear them all. If I own a restaurant and I say you know what, the food in my restaurant is not very good, we're not going to accept it. It's as simple as that.

Q. In light of that, will you be issuing a secret fine to Jaime Allison of Ford Motor Company for saying almost the exact same thing as Brad Keselowski did this week?

BRIAN FRANCE: Jaime Allison doesn't participate in NASCAR. I mean, he does in his corporate role, but come on.

Q. Sort of following up on that. One of the problems with the EFI, the electronic fuel injection topic, I think is the economy's bad and it's going to be expensive or be another expense. I think that's what Brad was talking about and we've been talking about in here and engine builders have been talking about. It is an extra expense at a bad time. Is it something that could be postponed for another year or so? Does it have to be right now?

BRIAN FRANCE: Well, we announced it several years ago. These are not the things that you can just pull off the shelf and put them back on and off. We have agreements with suppliers that have to be met.

You've got to remember why are we doing that? Because we want to be more relevant to the car manufacturers and other green technologies as well. We always said that we will do that in a balanced way. We're not going to be like some other divisions around the world that are heavily emphasized on that on technology.

But we're going to have to do more than we did in the past. It's not because we feel like doing it or want to put additional costs on anyone, but because they're accepting a lot of money from the car manufacturers, and that's what's under the hood on cars today, and we have to be mindful of that as we make policy.