Penske Stuff, Irony, Mystery Debris Solution, Subliminal Message, and Other Miscellany

Hendrick Decals On Penske Indy Cars
　
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this one out. Penske will be the lead Chevy team in IndyCar next season. Penske’s contract with Dodge also ends in 2012. The Queen of Hype will be driving for a Hendrick satellite team in the form of JR Motorsports next season in a full-time capacity. She has also threatened that she will be driving in the Indy 500 every year while she is in NA$CAR. Since she has managed to P.O. just about every team owner, engineer, strategist, crew chief, mechanic, driver, teammate, and pit crew in the garage through her temper tantrums, hissy fits, and inability to set up her own car, the only way she can get a ride boils down to somebody “buying” a ride for her and Slick Rick is the one who’ll be buying the ride.
　
Penske Has Sights Set on De Silvestro
　
Penske isn’t making any secrets about the fact that he wants Simona De Silvestro driving for Team Penske in IndyCar. Even with 2^nd degree burns on her hands, she attempted to run the Indy 500, which shows the signs of a true racer rather than a prima donna, spoiled driver. I think she and Team Penske will make a good match.
　
The Joke is Jabber Jaws, Not on Jabber Jaws
　
When Shrubbery spun out towards the end of the WWE 600 at Charlotte, good old Jabber Jaws immediately made the excuse that somebody had run into the rear of his car. Then on the replay, it was clear that there wasn’t a car within 3-4 car lengths of Shrubbery when he spun. Then Jabber Jaws trying making up yet another excuse for him spinning. Let’s face it, Jabber Jaws has become as big a joke in the announcing booth as he was at the end of his driving career. He needs to retire before he embarrasses himself any more than he already has.
　
Double Secret Probation Fine
　
It seems that Newman was secretly fined $50,000 for punching JPM. These sorts of fine are nothing new as we saw with Hamlin being sold out by a card carrying journalist to NA$CAR during Twittergate and by one legal definition could amount to extortion.
　
Subliminal Message with Pocono Sponsor?
　
Is NA$CAR telling us that the race is going to last 5 hours and that it will be a snoozer by having 5 Hour Energy Drink as the race sponsor? Maybe it should become the official sponsor of the cookie cutter tracks since they all tend to be snooze fests.
　
Great Idea for Debris Cautions
　
Mike in Orlando came up with a great idea to make sure that NA$CAR is on the up and up when it comes to debris cautions.
　
How's this for a way to get rid of our friend: put a helmet cam on the guys in the safety truck that pick the debris off the track during cautions. The same kind of helmet cam that is occasionally worn by "over-the-wallers" during pit stops. When a yellow flag is thrown for debris, the helmet cam goes on and stays on until the safety guys can show us just what kind of debris (if any) there actually was on the track to bring out the caution. For me, these phantom cautions call into question the integrity of that specific race and NASCAR in general. When a significant portion of your fan base equates your (supposedly on the level) sport to professional wrestling, you've got a problem. And yes, it would be interesting to see how many times the feed from the cam goes out at an inappropriate time, like when there's no debris to be found...anyway, thanks for indulging me.
　
“Boys Have At It” Confusion
　
When NA$CAR announced their new policy allowing drivers to express a little emotion on the track, I don’t think they were considering it would result in millions of dollars of cars and trucks ending up being scrap metal. And it seems that one or two drivers have taken it to heart by wrecking, spinning out, and punting other drivers throughout all 3 of NA$CAR’s top touring series. It doesn’t matter if the other driver was a wet-behind-the-ears rookie or a seasoned veteran, these drivers have wrecked them all with one of the two really taking it out on the rookies and less experienced drivers. To make matters worse, NA$CAR has hyped this up in their ads and interviews showing wrecks galore, even wrecks that happened with the old COT with the spoiler. McDowell’s qualifying wreck at Texas, Cousin/Crazy Carl going into the fence at Talladega, Bowyer sliding on his roof at Daytona, Logano tumbling down the track at Dover, and all of these wrecks being used to promote a races at tracks where these wrecks never occurred. Not to mention the ads for the All Star Race preaching revenge, getting even, and havoc run amok. And yet when Newman and Childress both practice their version of “Boys Have At It”, they’re punished for it. So who’s really at fault? Newman and Childress for going along with the program that NA$CAR is advocating or NA$CAR for laying the hype about “Boys Have At It” on so thick that people have actually started believing it?
　
By sitting around with their thumbs up their backsides and allowing certain drivers to conduct a reign of terror on the track, NA$CAR has contributed to the problem and is an instigator of it via their controlled media. As has happened in the past, NA$CAR is saying one thing yet doing another. They want drivers to have bare knuckle brawls to get folks to watch on TV or attend the races and want the drivers to wreck millions of dollars worth of race vehicles so they can fill the coffers of the Ivory Towers without having to spend much in the way of advertising. They get their controlled media to hype things up for them at no cost to the Ivory Towers. Then in turn they fine the drivers or owners for “actions detrimental” for carrying out “Boys Have At It” when they go bare knuckle with 30% of the money going to charity and 70% lining the pockets of various executives and staffers. So while there’s animosity and ill will running amok in the garage and on the track, NA$CAR is laughing all the way to the bank while quietly instigating and promoting the violence and carnage that’s happening.
　
Isn’t It Odd
　
When Shrubbery was nailed for doing 128 mph in a residential area putting the residents of the area at risk, his car manufacturer said nothing. When Shrubbery gets “pruned” by a 65 year old man, they come out in defense of Shrubbery and want the head of the “pruner” be served up on a silver platter.
　
Advice for Richard Childress
　
Two words: Tonya Harding.
　

Jules the Engine Guy had some interesting observations regarding irony:
　
#1
Dodge makes a complaint about engines, saying Ford has an advantage.
Yesterday, in the order of the makes, Dodge, Chevy, Toyota and Ford is last. Dodge dominates too. Nothing against Ford but amazing how that works out.
　
　
#2
With the advent of the new fueling procedures and ethanol, tires now last for an entire fuel run. Are the tires better or is the mileage worse? Also interesting is that its a 50/50 toss up as to whether or not the teams fill the cars with fuel. We heard of Biffle, Kurt Busch, and now Tony Stewart having these issues. One make of car seems left out. The make that hasn't had a problem advertises that its line is the most fuel efficient.
　
　
#3
Cryal Busch (although he does not admit it) tries his damnedest to drive like Earnhardt Sr. He loves it when they make that comparison. So what does he do? He gets ticketed for driving an exotic sports car 3x the speed limit in the county where Earnhardt Sr lived. Then he gets his ass kicked by a man almost 40 years his senior. That man, Earnhardt's car owner.
　
Penske Going to Chevy for Cup?
　
2012 is when Penske’s contract with Dodge runs out and with the announcement that his IndyCar operation will be the lead Chevy team and his IndyCar teams were spotted with Hendrick decals on the rear spoilers, you have to wonder if Penske is already building the new cars without saying anything or if he’s planning to have some sort of alliance with Hendrick in 2012 in the form of possibly being yet another Hendrick satellite team. I’m just speculating here but the indications are pretty strong. So what say you Roger? Is your Cup operation switching to Chevy or not come 2012?
　

TV Ratings Deception
　
Don’t be deceived by all the hype of how Focks ratings had the biggest increase in the last 11 years. If you go back and look at where the ratings were before Faux King Brian took over and the high point, the TV ratings are still down by at least 25%. So while they may have gone up for Focks this season, they’re nowhere near where they use to be.

　

Credibility, Points System, Bill Lester Returning?, & North Wilkesboro Speedway Award

Credibility

Credibility? We don't need no stinking credibility!

　
"The goal for some time has been to create a points system that is easy to understand, easy to explain, easy to be talked about, but also be credible at the end of the season" Mafia Mike in an ESPN article　

Hate to tell you this Mafia Mike but NASCAR started losing its credibility in 2003 when it went from NASCAR to NA$CAR with the ascension of Faux King Brian to the throne and it’s been going downhill ever since. Some fans have questioned whether or not NA$CAR has any credibility left after observing the WWE-like antics that have been happening, the promises that have been made that weren’t delivered on, the changes for change sake, and the absence of any real leadership down in the Ivory Towers. When two drivers get caught with cars out of tolerance and one driver gets a warning and the other is penalized 150 points for it, something is very wrong. When NA$CAR openly admits it throws Ms Terry DeBris cautions to “make things more exciting” or “to bunch them up”, that drops your credibility right down the toilet. When the sanctioning body takes money from a car manufacturer to get into the racer-tainment business and gets “favors to be named later”, you have the credibility of a DC politician with a bunch of angry taxpayers. And that’s where the sanctioning body sits right now. 　

New Points System　　

One of the things not addressed by this new points system is the penalty points issue. Although it is supposed to be proportional to the current points system, nothing was given as a firm number. The fans wanted more emphasis on winning. I’ve read a number of figures running from 25-100 points for a win over and above the regular points. Instead, it’s 3. The simplified points system does the exact same thing the old system did except with smaller numbers. It rewards consistency, even in the play-offs. NA$CAR did not listen to the fans.
　
The fans wanted the play-off system eliminated, depending on whose poll you used, anywhere from 55%-97% want it gone. It’s still here showing that once again, NA$CAR didn’t listen to the fans. The fans and manufacturers want the cars to resemble what’s on the street so that there’s a definite connection between the fans, cars, and brand identity. Nope, it’s till the same, generic looking vehicle with new decals and the splitter bars removed which shows that once again NA$CAR still isn’t listening.

And what’s the incentive for being 11^th and 12^th place? Based on what they showed on the graphics during the dog and pony show, 11^th and 12^th place cannot move up. So why even bother showing up at the track if you can’t move up in points? It’s back to being a Top 10 play-off system that fans don’t like or want. Even Bruton is doubting the wisdom of keeping it around and whether or not it’ll still be around in the next few years. At least he’s smart enough to know that if you don’t give the fans what they want they won’t be coming back.
　
　
Jules the Engine Guy’s Points Solution　
　
This is what Jules the Engine Guy came up with:


Prior to the Chase


A) Everyone starts out with 10,000 points:
10,000


B) Anyone in top 35 in car owners points:
+ 1,000 + (35 minus your finishing position)
example, if you finished 20th in points, (10000+(1000+(35-20))) = 11,015


C) Anyone NOT in top 35 in car owners points:
- 1,000


D) If you are Jimmy Johnson, the current champ or Dale Earnhardt Jr
+ 2,000


E) If you are NOT Jimmy Johnson, the current champ or Dale Earnhardt Jr
- 1,000


F) If your car owner is Hendrick, Roush, Childress or Gibbs:
+5,000


G) If your car owner is NOT Hendrick, Roush, Childress or Gibbs:
-2,500


H) If you drive a Ford or a Dodge:
-1,000


I) If you drive a Chevrolet (and your car/team is related to Hendrick):
+2,000


J) If you drive a Chevrolet (and your car/team is NOT related to Hendrick):
+500


K) If you drive a Toyota:
+1,500


L) If you do NOT! My Space, Twitter, Twat, Tweet, Spit, or Speak ANYTHING NEGATIVE about NASCAR:
+2,500


M) If you DO My Space, Twitter, Twat, Tweet, Spit, or Speak ANYTHING NEGATIVE about NASCAR and your car owner is Hendrick, Roush, Childress or Gibbs:
-500


N) If you DO My Space, Twitter, Twat, Tweet, Spit, or Speak ANYTHING NEGATIVE about NASCAR and your car owner is NOT Hendrick, Roush, Childress or Gibbs:
-2,500



Now while this seems complicated. let me assure you it is not. This system guarantee's the status quo and consistency. This system insures that the top 12 will ALWAYS be the top 12.


It is also much more like the NFL and MLB where as there are always the same teams (and number of teams) playing. No new or different teams making a showing is much less confusing.


No longer will you have to drudge through those boring, don't matter much (just as DW), first 26 races. You can wait till the chase.


During the chase


A) All 12 cars will be painted exactly the same. No names or lettering will be on the cars.

B) The crews and drivers will be dressed that same and disguised to all look the same.

C) The points will be awarded based on finishing position. But who will know who finished where? NASCAR will tell you.

　
Dave’s Points Solution　
　
Dave, my old racing buddy from Texas, came up with this solution:
　
Gee.......why don't they award points for the amount of advertising dollars a car's sponsor kicks in for mention money? The more money, the more points. The little guys don't get anything, even if they somehow win and will eventually go away. The Roto-Rooter car crossed the line 14th, but sent the most money to NA$CRAP and Fox, so they get most of the points. The Booth Comedy Team (tm) will wet themselves over how wonderful the new system is and pound it into the fad fans (who won't know the difference anyway). Win-win-win situation, eh?
Or should we not give them the idea?
　
Granted, these aren’t real points systems but do you get the idea that the fans who have been around a while like both Jules and Dave won’t be thrilled with the new points program and will find yet another reason not to show up at the track or watch the racer-tainment on TV?
　
　
North Wilkesboro Speedway Receives Award　

L to R: George Marsden, Rob Marsden, Terry Parsons, Steve Wilson, Ann Marie Wilson

　
Not widely mentioned by the lamestream media or the Kool Aid drinkers was the fact that North Wilkesboro Speedway received an award from The North Carolina Motorsports Association. North Wilkesboro Speedway received the Motorsports Industry Award for Track Management at the annual banquet. The award recognizes tracks, educational institutions, media, suppliers and manufacturers for their contributions to the motorsports industry in North Carolina. When you consider that the only thing keeping North Wilkesboro in the public eye a couple of years ago was the Save the Speedway group, it’s come a long ways towards regaining some of its former glory day in the past 2 years.

　

Bill Lester's Rolex Camaro (pic taken by unknown fan)

　
　
Bill Lester Returning?　

Based on some of what Bill Lester has written on Facebook and Twitter, there’s a possibility we could see him in a part-time Cup ride if everything works out with his sponsorship. Right now, Bill is driving a Camaro in the Rolex Series. If you haven’t met Bill, he’s a pretty decent guy and very fan friendly.

　

David Hill Wants Shorter Races

　
David Hill, the same wonderful person who brought us that damnable gopher, wants to shorten the races to 3 hours. I see this as yet another attempt to appease the Short Attention Span Crowd and because Focks, who does a terrible job presenting the races, is supposedly losing money even though they run tons of commercials, plug and shill for everything possible, run so many sponsored graphics it takes up about 1/3 to ½ the TV screen, gladly accept all the “mention money” they can get from any team, sponsor, or manufacturer who is willing to fork it over, and get paid by both the cable and satellite providers for their broadcasts.
　
If Focks really wanted to broadcast timed races, they’d be broadcasting F-1 or some sports car or sedan racing series so they could have the 2-3 hours of timed racing and then move on to the next program. If time is that critical to Focks and David Hill, then maybe they should move the Cup Series races over to Speed and broadcast the F-1 and sports car series races on Focks. That way Focks will have their timed races, David Hill is happy, the Short Attention Span Crowd is happy, and the F-1 and sports car series folks can be aggravated by the tons of commercials, plugs, shilling, inane babble, and Goopher the Gopher that have plagued the folks watching NA$CAR.
　
The real solution? Eliminate the pre-race show. It’s a combination of what happened during the week (which most fans have already heard or read), fluff, hype, and shilling. That cuts off a wasted 1-1.5 hours. Just go straight to the Invocation, National Anthem, a driver run down during the pace laps, and you’re off and running. Eliminate the Ms Terry DeBris Cautions. That’ll shave 15-30 minutes off the broadcast and the race. Show the driver in Victory Lane, give a finishing running order, and boom, you’re off the air. No need to recap the race. We already saw it.